Thought an obligatory lyric by The Graduate would sum up this post. Well it’s been awhile tumblr. I’m still as lost & confused as I was the last time I wrote on here. Maybe even more so. Rumors about what women really look for in guys have been greatly exaggerated. Great personality? False. Someone who’s funny? Nada. Sincerity? Yeah right. Someone who will treat them right? If a black eye counts. Women try and build up their reputations by making the world see their mind games as innocent tomfoolery instead of taking them for what they are. Women act like all guys are shallow, insecure, arrogant assholes. Let me tell you, there are a lot of pricks like this, but most of the men like this are in relationships. So where’s the justice? I try to be the best man that I can be. I’m sincere, I try and be nice, I consider myself funny and I don’t consider myself (that) ugly. Yet, I feel like I’m the Hunchback of Notre Dame. Sloth from “The Goonies.” Whatever horrid monster you prefer from 1980’s fiction. I don’t consider myself shallow. Let me reiterate that, I don’t consider myself anymore shallow than the average human being. I do find redeeming qualities in various women that attract me to them, but not all of them are purely on a physical level. I just feel like there is no woman out there that understands the plight of the modern day hopeless romantic. I see women that I think are beautiful, that look miserable with who they’re with, because their boyfriends treat them like shit. It makes me want to throw up, because I know that I’m more of a man than most of these assholes. People tell me that I need to try harder, but if I haven’t been trying hard enough, then I don’t know if I can handle trying harder. Maybe I should end my suffering and settle with the next woman that I run into, but then again I’ve never been one to settle. Settling means you’ve given up on everything that you stood for and anyone that knows me knows that I’m the farthest from that. I guess I have to hold on to hope and clinch on tight and wait for fate to pave out my destiny. I just feel so utterly hopeless, because no woman has ever given me the time of day. I find a single girl I like and she is going after another guy (and/or) doesn’t like me. I find a girl that I think likes me and I find out she has a boyfriend. It’s a never ending process. As Bryce Avary from The Rocket Summer once said, “There’s so much love clinched within our fist.” That lyrics has never rung truer to me, that sums up my feelings recently perfectly. I feel like I have so much love to give, but no one to reciprocate the feeling. Another lyric that seems to fit right here is that of the one & only Conor Oberst (Bright Eyes), he said “To love or be loved.” Maybe we are destined to be one or the other: a lover or the one being loved. Maybe we can never completely be both. If so then this is a cruel world that we live in. Almost all of the good guys I know are single. I mean Nick has Erin and she’s cool as hell and I’m happy for them. Weston is finally paving a road with Alex and I’m happy for them as well, but besides them two, I can’t think of any of my really good friends that I consider nice guys that have someone that cares for them. I’m just tired of hearing women say that there are no more nice guys out there, when they continually reject them and then go on to the next asshole that trips them down 3 flights of stairs. I just wish women wouldn’t be so naive, all of this naivity is causing pain & heart ache for everyone involved…except for the bros that you continually going back for. If I was shy and stayed in my comfy little hermit shell, then I would have no reason to bitch, but I’m not. I continually go out and tell the women that I like how I feel about them and one after another rejects me. Tall, short, big, skinny, white, asian, hispanic, it doesn’t matter what characteristics each of these women have, they all obviously find me as less than a person, they find me as a plague infested leper. I didn’t think that one free dinner would physically kill someone, but apparently it must if this many women find lame excuses to reject me. I mean come on. Are there any women out there with any heart left? Or is it tucked away with their dignity that they lose when they keep their legs open for any viser wearing, jagermeister chugging frat guy with whiskey dick that wants to get his snaked petted. I mean it’s not like I’m asking for too much. I’m looking for a genuinely sweet woman that has better things to do than waste their lives on drugs and alcohol (I don’t care if they drink or smoke weed occasionally; but I don’t want an addict or a smoker) and someone that knows who they are in this world, without pretending to be something they aren’t. Pure beauty is better than dolled up silicon bimbos any day of the week. So, I will leave you with a question. Does this woman exist? If so, then where is she? I certainly haven’t met her yet, if you do send her my way.